The Imperfect Boss / And Why That's Enough
/I’m no rookie at this whole #imperfectboss thing. Not only have I participated in previous campaigns, but I am truly an #imperfectboss.
I don’t say this to put myself down or make you feel sorry for me because it seems I have low self-esteem. I say this in an effort to: 1. shatter any illusions there may be about “having it all together” and 2. encourage others that perfection is not the goal.
I don’t have a staff, so I am technically a boss of one—me. And I am a darn good boss, if I may say so myself. But I’ve got a long way to go. I excel at so many things, but fall short in so many more.
So let’s shatter the myth together. Whether you have a staff of one or hundreds, none of us are doing it all right. We don’t have it all together and we’re messing up. And that is OK! This whole boss lady thing is tough and a lot of work. A LOT OF WORK.
MY STATEMENTS OF IMPERFECTIONS:
1. anxiety + depression /
This is no newsflash as I try to be very open about my anxiety and depression. I don’t like to use the words “struggle” and “deal” because those have negative connotations, but I will say that these diagnoses are challenges for anyone, but are amplified in the world of “bossdom.” When I’m sitting at my desk with my hands shaking, heart pounding and frustration building as these feelings are out of my control, decision-making and productivity become a challenge (on top of the everyday challenges we all face).
2. I don’t know what I’m doing /
It’s exhausting keeping up a front of “having it all together” and acting like I know what I’m doing when I HAVE NO IDEA! This is all new to me and I’m figuring it out as I go. I think I’m hard on myself for not knowing what I don’t know and don’t offer myself enough grace.
3. I am afraid of offending people /
I recently realized this is a big deal to me—ultimately, it comes down to my pride. In a sense, I feel like I’ve reverted to junior high status again, hoping that everyone likes my new jeans or hairdo. I care what people think. Too much. And more specifically, I am afraid of unintentionally hurting or offending people. It makes me sick—literally—like sends me into a fit of anxiety. I have a hard time remembering that I know my heart, I know my intentions, and I am not going to please everyone all the time. I wish I didn’t care, but I do!
but...
I am still getting it done, making things happen and running my business like a boss. And so can you. Why? Because you are enough. Just as you are.
WHAT IMPERFECTIONS DO YOU DEAL WITH?